[ Azura stares at him in....horror? Grief? But then there's something that pops up in her head again, something she's been thinking about all the time she's been here.
"I choose my own fate." ]
It isn't who you're "supposed" to be. You can be anything you'd like to be.
[ She furrows her brows together and takes a deep breath, willing herself to not start crying again. ]
Maybe you were this person at some point in your life, before I met you. But that isn't who you are today. Unless you're telling me that all the time we've spent together, that accepting me as your daughter was all a cruel joke, then "who you are" is someone with a jovial heart and a quick wit and a knack for scheming, not--this.
I know what you're feeling. It's when...everything gets so bad, you start to think "it would be better if I felt nothing at all!" I would be lying if I said I didn't feel similarly, that I have not felt similarly for years and years and years. I used to feel like it would be better if I didn't exist at all, because that would be better than feeling the pain all day, every day.
[ your daughter has serious depression, isn't that fun ]
And what do you mean by "value"? You--you have value, I value you and so does Silver and so does Ingway, and I'm betting the people you knew before coming here value you just as much.
I know you're not human, but you're still a person, even if you don't want to think of yourself that way. And any person has feelings, including bad ones they wish they didn't have to deal with. If this is all because you don't want to feel grief...I'm begging you, please stop.
Because, what does he Say to that? To every word that pierces him so thoroughly, that -
He's been seen, and not by a Detective, or a student or pupil. By a girl who he's accepted as his own, who sees the screams he's had echoing inside of himself, bottling them up while desperately wanting them to be seen.
And now, at the edge of his limits, the end of his rope -
He has no more strength to push her away, or even care about his composure - and no desire to do anything but the one thing he's been wanting to do from the moment the ones he cared for began to die.
The icy form - the napoleon of crime, the calculating criminal - Shatters, and Moriarty's face twists into a grimace of pain and grief as he lowers his head and begins to sob, tears flowing down his cheeks.]
I...couldn't -
['I couldn't stop any of it.']
Ah...Why must I....always lose anything I care for....?
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cw talk of suicide
"I choose my own fate." ]
It isn't who you're "supposed" to be. You can be anything you'd like to be.
[ She furrows her brows together and takes a deep breath, willing herself to not start crying again. ]
Maybe you were this person at some point in your life, before I met you. But that isn't who you are today. Unless you're telling me that all the time we've spent together, that accepting me as your daughter was all a cruel joke, then "who you are" is someone with a jovial heart and a quick wit and a knack for scheming, not--this.
I know what you're feeling. It's when...everything gets so bad, you start to think "it would be better if I felt nothing at all!" I would be lying if I said I didn't feel similarly, that I have not felt similarly for years and years and years. I used to feel like it would be better if I didn't exist at all, because that would be better than feeling the pain all day, every day.
[ your daughter has serious depression, isn't that fun ]
And what do you mean by "value"? You--you have value, I value you and so does Silver and so does Ingway, and I'm betting the people you knew before coming here value you just as much.
I know you're not human, but you're still a person, even if you don't want to think of yourself that way. And any person has feelings, including bad ones they wish they didn't have to deal with. If this is all because you don't want to feel grief...I'm begging you, please stop.
no subject
Because, what does he Say to that? To every word that pierces him so thoroughly, that -
He's been seen, and not by a Detective, or a student or pupil. By a girl who he's accepted as his own, who sees the screams he's had echoing inside of himself, bottling them up while desperately wanting them to be seen.
And now, at the edge of his limits, the end of his rope -
He has no more strength to push her away, or even care about his composure - and no desire to do anything but the one thing he's been wanting to do from the moment the ones he cared for began to die.
The icy form - the napoleon of crime, the calculating criminal - Shatters, and Moriarty's face twists into a grimace of pain and grief as he lowers his head and begins to sob, tears flowing down his cheeks.]
I...couldn't -
['I couldn't stop any of it.']
Ah...Why must I....always lose anything I care for....?
no subject
Azura stands and wraps her arms around him, settling her chin on his head. ]
It feels that way, does it not? [ Her dad. Her mom. Her surrogate mom. Her kingdom, that she was supposed to grow and lead and make prosper. ]
no subject
[That's the last he manages to get out before he just surrenders himself totally to his grief, crying like he'll never stop.
Crying for all he's been through in this game - for all everyone he ever cared about has been through, what they've all suffered from.
Crying for things he couldn't change, couldn't stop - even when he was alive.
He weeps and sobs, until finally, they die down, and all that can be heard is his ragged breathing.]